The warm sand gives way with each unconscious step I take.
The humid air whips,sweeps moist strands hair across my face.
I breathe in,
I breathe out,
Letting the warm, salty air cleanse my weary soul.
The ocean air does not blend with my rusty ribcage-
The lock breaks,
Though broken and fixed before,
It is beyond repair.
Doubt, worry, anger, disappointment-all the caged creatures take flight,
As I deeply exhale once more.
These creatures were not meant to enjoy the ocean air-
As they begin to mingle with the salty, humid air they disintegrate,
Falling ever so helplessly into the lapping white foam of the tide.
Their bitter sweet taste lingers on the tip of my tongue,
But soon fades away,
A taste I will never miss.

This is what the ocean does to me.
It erases all trace of emotion,
It calms my lost and broken soul
It release me from my blackened chains of bondage.
As new troubled thoughts arise the waves silently hush them away.
It gives me hope that all things will change
Because the tide is never once the same
Like cold, wet sand
My once hard soul has dried and crumbled
It’s waiting to find something worth transforming for
Unable to move,
I sit and listen to the seagulls call,
Dreaming of how their freedom feels-
No limits
No boundaries
No rules
Just free open ocean air
The wind and waves-
They move me,
Move me to dreaming.
My once ugly arms
Now majestic, graceful wings
As I am lifted up
I am lost,
So completely lost
In the beauty of the moment.
I am at peace
As the wind and waves move me.

This is what the ocean does to me.

.....

made this the other night after i got off the phone with my dad and little brother. i miss them both so much, so much that it hurts physically sometimes. they live back in my home state: florida and i live in west virginia. i see my dad every four months at the least and i only see my brother when i go down there in the summer. i hate that i am not an active part of his life. i want to be there for him at the end of each day, but i cant and that kills me. i look forward to hearing his sweet voice every night. most times he will just ramble and rhyme words for 15 min. i love it! i could listen to him ramble forever. i can't wait to see him this summer.

tfr
xo
jess