i don't understand

it has been months, heck maybe even a year since we have talked.. a year? or two? since you ended things...heck ive even let go moved on to other guys.. yet still to this day you have this "power" over me. i can't take it. today things were fine. but then that video came on, the song kinda slightly reminded me of you..ok whatever but then out of no where i have tears slowing streaming down my face. i pray to God that your picture does not show up cause i know full well i will not be able to control myself..sure enough there you are. your picture staring at me. like i predicted i could not control my emotions, just like that all of our memories flooded my head. for a moment i missed you and it hurt like hell and i hate myself for missing you. it seems like yesterday was that day in december when we "first" saw each other. when you hugged me like no one had ever done before but no that day was forever ago, its nothing but a bittersweet memory but i could not stop the stupid tears. im thinking what the heck? i am over you why am i crying. i know you will "go away" but you will be completely safe there, you will return home i know you will. i just know it..

i just hate that i miss you cause i know full well you don't miss me back, you could careless about me. i hate that you can do this to me. i don't regret a thing but still i hate that you make me like this....